Before the feast that makes me bloated, I snuggled up in the cozy corner of a bookstore awaiting the arrival of others. This filipino guy approached me for donation for the recent earthquake in Manila. After the process of authentication, I chipped in some money. Half the reason is because that guy is really sweet, kind, well-mannered and most of all, he has a smile that can brighten up the whole town! So darn nice! As for another half, it is because Philippine holds a special place in my heart.

I was once an exchange student over there. Did I mention that I have the best host family of all? Trust me, they will rock your world and I’m darn lucky to be part of them.  Although I wasn’t placed in Manila, the abundant hospitality that they’d shown me was more than enough to make  me remember it  for a lifetime. The culture, the food, and the people were equally amazing. I really miss them and I promised myself to revisit the place that I once called home in the near future. Frankly speaking, I did not even miss home when I was there.

It’s a small small world, bL!nk$t@R.

The desk and drawer are finally uncluttered. It’s an “unburdening” effect, quipped by Richard Templar, the author of Rules of Life. Everytime we begin to clear things up and reorganise our stuffs, it signifies that we are prepare to start anew. Along the way, we might spot things that were once lost, that will evoke our memories and make us reminisce on the past.

Undeniably, there are things that we hesitate to dispose off, especially things that might be useful to us in the future. Yea, so it’s just a ‘might’ only and it’s mighty enough to place us in a quandary. But who knows, 10 years from now, our lives will be in a topsy-turvy state. I guess we should be even more worried whether human race could sail past 2012!

Eventually, I end up recycling those materials. Truth be told, I did retained some possession as keepsake. Even though we really dump away those ‘unwanted’ stuffs, how sure are we that we will never think about it again? I reckon you will agree with me that in spite of everything,  we are just pure humans-humans with feelings. And, this is what that makes us difference from other organisms.

Be sure to be proud whenever you have the ability to feel~

Recollecting humanity, bL!nk$t@R.

I took out my calculator and start counting some figures. Sigh. I’m taking a step back to review my decision.

There are still some minor things in life that I’m learning to do. Things that even a child is capable of doing. It may seem to be small, but it’s huge to me and requires lots of courage. I wonder, is there anyone who is facing the same problem like me?

That inner me is struggling in the water at times. It needs a float, or perhaps, a lifeguard to save it. Still, silence is my best defense against all.

Gazing at strangers, staring at the tv, I dream vividly about the times that yet to come. I guess I’m pretty clear of what’s ahead of me. Just that I have to return to reality which is something my heart withheld assent against it since my brain ripens. Or, you could say that it’s a sort of silent protest in me.

The silent protester wants to be heard, bL!nk$t@R.

]]> http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/11/20/silent-protest/feed/ 0 blinkstar maths http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/11/16/musings-soaking-wet/ http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/11/16/musings-soaking-wet/#comments Mon, 16 Nov 2009 09:30:43 +0000 blinkstar http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/?p=1097 ]]>

The downpour has yet to stop since morning and it left me with a pair of soaking wet sports shoes. There is melancholy in the weather and driving back alone often chucks me in musing mode. I think it’s already a habit to embroil myself in those typical sad feelings (including some eye-squinting actions). Got the blue just like me?

By the way, I slept consciously for approximately 5 hours last night. Although my eyes were shut, I still can sense what is happening around me. I don’t think insomnia is the word. I would rather call it conscious sleeping and trust me you are just like a zombie. Exams are here again and my heart rate was not at resting pace. These minor palpitations are giving me sleepless night. -_-

Someone told me that the reason why people indirectly keep reminding you of your future absence is because they are in a state of denial, somehow reluctant to accept the fact. Despair, that person said. I said, life still goes on.

respecting choices, reasons and tons of excuses, bL!nk$t@R.

Insomnia is officially back again.

Gosh. It was 2.59am as I woke up and turned towards the clock. Needless to say, my brain was still active. In fact, I don’t really do much thinking during the day. You see, when the thoughts start to enter, it’s hard for it to stop. That explains why I can’t fall asleep and I’d been lying on the bed since 12am.

You may find it weird that I even thought about what to blog today. This mind of mine constantly revolves around the future lately. To be specific, the year 2010. It conceives one idea after another. One thing I know, a quite massive change is imminent and there is a dash of excitement in me.

I guess I’m happy enough to say that I accidentally found a similar replacement for something I’d lost few years ago.

Flipp was born on yesterday midnight. Stay tuned.

In need of better sleep, bL!nk$t@R.

Pipit 3rd Anniversary was organised at the Annexe Gallery, Central Market on the 7th November 2009. I saw many photo enthusiasts carrying their DSLR around snapping close up pictures. That’s cool. Those who have attended will spot lots of knick-knacks and cute stuffs on sale. And that’s really cute and I felt like grabbing all of it. It’s pricey though.

Before that, we were having lunch at Petaling Street (Tan Sri Francis Yeoh’s favourite place for Hokkien Mee). What makes it special is that this Hokkien Mee is cooked on charcoal fire and the recipe has been passed down through 3 generations.

Must bring dad over there for his favourite Hokkein Mee, bL!nk$t@R.

The 3 must-eat food over there!

satisfying my weekly nasi lemak craving & I’m back for otak-otak, bL!nk$t@R.

I started to have plans again. Way back in high school, I was a planning freak and my brain is likened to a PDA. That’s also one of the main reasons why I get insomnia. Turning on the bed for hours with the brain’s inability to rest, those who have insomnia knows what am I referring to.

Somehow, approximately 2 years ago after I entered college, things took a turn. I was on the side of enjoying life rather than enriching my life with busyness. There used to be a constant hum. Figuring out why, I thought that it was time for me to take a rest although I absolutely like the feeling of engaging myself in non-stop activities.

A transition exists but honestly I love to bring my old self into the future without abandoning the current me.

Recently, happy thoughts arise whenever my feet are running. Because of that, it gives me the power to run faster..

Mad about planning, bL!nk$t@R.

I always have this fear or feeling that one day I might end up smoking, chasing after money or even transformed into a robot without feelings anymore. It haunts me at times as the future is unbeknown to us. Sometimes when you think about it, this world is pretty much scary.

You see, uncertainty has shaken my faith quite a heap this year. I often warn the people around me not to be surprised if they ever found me doing some ‘unusual’ things. At times, it sounds more compelling to do whatever we want rather than refraining ourselves from certain things. Humans are filled with desires, desires that never come to an end. Because of this, we become so vulnerable to the extend that it’s so easy for us to make mistakes.

Therefore, we have to think. We have to be rational. We have to continue believing in bad good things.

prevent myself from falling into the trap, bL!nk$t@R.

]]> http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/unbeknownst/feed/ 0 blinkstar http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/tas-lot-10/ http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/2009/10/21/tas-lot-10/#comments Wed, 21 Oct 2009 06:25:30 +0000 blinkstar http://blinkstar.wordpress.com/?p=1071 ]]>

The Actor's Studio @ Lot 10

Been there to witness the opening. Fantastic.